Archive for July 2011

Meta-Injunction: this summer’s biggest blocked-buster

Injunctions. Remember those? Those things we thought were scary, before superinjunctions came about. And then those hyperinjunctions, which were worse somehow. And then that David Cameron got involved, trying to score cheap political points by criticising them for being evil instruments of the European Convention on Human Rights.

Now it’s time for the next step on the injunction scale. Meta-Injunction: a gagging order so powerful that even to know its name is to break the law.

Can this legal instrument be stopped? Can the Prime Minister wring political capital out of it regardless? And has voiceover man irreversibly damaged his larynx? Only one way to find out. Watch the trailer for this summer’s biggest blockbuster, before it watches you.

In theatres June 31st.

Written by Tom and Statto

July 6, 2011 at 22:58

Posted in moving pictures

Teen unconsoled after judge X-Boxes clever on bail terms

A Belfast judge has released a thirteen year-old robber on bail on the condition that he gives up his X-Box games console, reports the Irish broadcaster RTÉ:

When the judge asked the boy what it was he owned that meant a lot to him the teenager said it was his games system. The judge told the youth it would show him what it was like to have something he valued taken from him.

Now, this is all well and good until Belfast’s biggest, baddest burglars acquire decoy valued items, possibly through the medium of theft. Or simply profess to prize items to which, in reality, they ascribe no worth: ‘Well, you’re free to go, but we’ll have to impound the contents of your vacuum cleaner bag, Mr O’Liable.’

However, on the off-chance that this kind of punishment does work, it could extend neatly to perpetrators of more serious crimes. ‘Who’s your favourite person?’ we might ask convicted murderers. ‘It’s your husband, is it? Yeah? …Sure? Have him killed.’

Or, for young rapists: ‘What’s your favourite possession?’

‘My BMX, m’lud.’

‘Jerome; you know what to do.’ (This.)

Written by Tom and Statto

July 5, 2011 at 19:40

Posted in legal, local news